As you can see, last week was a little bit rough for us around here. I think that it definitely could have been worse, but in the midst of it when your power is out for days, damage to the yard, and not being able to walk around outside for fear of objects falling on you; it can get a little old. But I really think the Lord used last week not only to make me aware of some things that I needed to learn, but also areas that I continue to struggle with and grow in. With that being said, here are some of the things I learned from my experience last week……..
1. I don’t know how anyone else deals with “trials” in their lives, but it is something I usually struggle with. Earlier in my life, if a situation came along that was going to be uncomfortable or trying for me, my usual tendency was to shut down. Emotionally I would become numb, because I hate that state of limbo I find myself in when things get tough. Basically I am a control freak, so I hate when things are out of my control, plus I never really learned to just “be” in a situation and not have a way to fix it. Considering it got to the point last week where I felt like I had no control of when I would get my power back on, or life would resume as normal, I didn’t know what to do with myself. My first instinct was to want to shut down all of my emotions because it was uncomfortable, and live in a state of numbness so I wouldn’t have to deal with anything. But I really feel like the Lord in the past couple of years has been showing me how to walk with Him during these specific times. A couple of things I have learned to do are to try to have a constant conversation with the Lord, and in a sense almost wrestle with the Lord through these trials. Having my raw emotions out on the table, and trying not lose contact with Him. Even though half the time I might be mad or frustrated, continuing to try to make a conscious effort to include the Lord in my struggles has drawn me a lot closer to Him than just completely shutting down. Sometimes I want to scream, other times ball, or just try to fix it on my own. But I love when I get all of these things off my chest, and this peace comes over me that I can’t describe. Then even though I might not be where I want to be, I know that I am not alone in it. This has taken time to get better at, but I think I become better at it each time. There is just something healing about being real with the Lord, even though He already knows everything. It has been a huge struggle for me, but when I get to the “top of the mountain”, I look back and realize that I got through it, and learned something from it.
2. It is important to have friends in your life who know the real person you are, and can sit with you in your not so fun moments. A couple other things happened last week on top of all that the storm had brought with it, and I just got to the point where I just couldn’t take it anymore and I just let it all out! I have to admit, I am not the type of person that is okay with crying like a blubbering fool in front of people, but this time I just couldn’t help it. Even though there wasn’t much said I am thankful for my friend just being there with me in that moment, and letting me go a little crazy without judgment. I think that everyone needs someone like that in their life. Someone who can be there to walk along side you when you feel like you are at the end of your rope. Nothing even needs to be said, it is just the fact that someone is totally okay with you being yourself, and accepts you even in those moments. I am so thankful that the Lord has brought people like that in my life, even though I find it hard for me to find sometimes. I pray that I can be that person for others as well.
3. I hate asking for help. I am a very independent person, and hate to be a burden to others. But sometimes I will be the person helping others, and sometimes I am the person that needs help. That is what the body of believers is for. We were not meant to do life alone. We were created to have relationships with others, and help carry the burdens of others as well. Not that we rely on others for everything, but understanding that we can’t do everything by ourselves either. So don’t be afraid to ask for help or accept it. We were created to help each other, and live in relationships with one another. I am so thankful for the help we received last week.
4. Finally, despite everything that happens in my life…..the Lord is always faithful. He is always there. He always knows what I need, even before I do. He wants to walk through my life with me, not be held off at a distance. Because it is in these situations like this where I learn and grow the most. Not that I would want things like this freakish storm to happen all the time, but I appreciate what I went through after it has happened.
I am not sure what anyone else went through last week, but I know that I am a better person because of the experience. But still……there is no way I want to do it again! 🙂