When You Aren’t Your “Best Self” To Your Significant Other

We’ve probably heard these verses before, right? These may even have been read at your wedding, or maybe you hope to have them read at your wedding one day. As lovely as these verses sound, it is often hard on a daily basis to live out what it says in 1 Corinthians. For some reason it can be the most important people in our lives who can get the worst parts of us. My husband and I can definitely name a time or two where we haven’t been our “best self” to each other.

For example, after a busy day when we are both worn out, probably isn’t going to be a time where we both are feeling like going the extra mile for the other. Plus combining 4 kids into the mixture only makes us that much more on edge. When you combine these factors, it almost creates the perfect storm for being unkind to one another. Words can be said, but taken wrong. Something might not be done up to expectations of the other. One wants to connect, the other wants to watch the news. Did we mention the kids that want your attention every single second? Especially in these moments, we need to call on Jesus to help us love. It seems impossible to do it on our own.

It’s not that we mean to, but especially being 2 imperfect people in a relationship(married, engaged, or dating) there are bound to be times when intentionally or not, we treat the other poorly.

How can we make sure that we are living out what it says in these verses, in relation to our significant other?

1. Take inventory of how you are doing. Despite how I feel, how have I been treating my significant other lately? Go through each characteristic of love in 1 Corinthians 13. Have you been patient? Kind? Have you insisted on your own way lately? Or been irritable?

2. How is your attitude toward your significant other most of the time? Regardless of the situation, do you always believe the best about them? Do you give them the benefit of the doubt?

3. It can seem hard to love well all the time. When it does get difficult, pray and ask Jesus to help you. The nice thing is we don’t have to do it alone.

These suggestions are just a starting point, but I believe it can help us get on the right track to treating the special person in our lives how they should be treated. It is going to take some effort, but your relationship is worth fighting for!

Jesus, I thank you for the relationship that we have with our special someone. Although we care for them so much, it can be hard to love well. Teach us how to. Help us realize how special they are, and to not take them for granted. We are grateful for each gift you give us. Amen.